Be discrete with whom you share the special things God reveals to you. They foster jealousy and resentment in those at the end of their ropes. Relationships are delicate and easily bruised by unthoughtful words carelessly spoken.
Is there a jealous person who would like to throw you into a pit? That person could be your sibling, your friend, your colleague, your boss…
The story of Joseph is one of those stories we never tire of hearing. Jacob exercises poor judgment and sends Joseph to check on the older brothers.
The sight of Joseph in his flamboyant coat ignites the brothers’ hatred. They plot his murder. Reuben the eldest son steps in the gap and pleads for Joseph’s life. They compromise, throw him in a pit and then sell him into slavery. Sibling jealousy forced Joseph to the end of his rope.
Today the “Let’s kill him” attitude is, “Let’s throw cold water all over his dreams. Let’s not compliment their new clothes. Let’s mock his new faith and knock the heart right out of him.” With friends like that, who needs enemies?
Can you identify with Joseph and his brothers? Have you ever been pushed to the point where you found yourself pondering physical or psychological harm to another?
It’s possible that like Joseph, God is showering His favour on you. All the right doors are opening to/for you at just the right time. None of your children challenges your’s or God’s authority. Your home is not turned into a domestic war zone. You’ve never had an end of the rope experience. Every decision and choice you make seems to be right every time.
Hold God’s purposes for your life close to your chest. There is a time in which God will make them public. Premature disclosure can trigger a negative reaction among your close relationships.
It is not easy sometimes for adults to work well with others, let alone children. Children, though, if taught from a young age will work well with others, will grow up and excel at any activity.
We all know teamwork is important. It’s a life skill our children need to master in order to succeed in life. Teamwork is a great confidence builder as well. Independence is important, but interdependence is what keeps us growing together and going forward. A family that can function well as a team is ready to take on anything that comes its way.
Teamwork teaches our children to trust others, communicate and cooperate with them. They learn to respect others and realize their strengths and weaknesses.
So how can we teach our children teamwork?
How early should parents start teaching their children teamwork?
How did you teach your child to work as a team member?
I am responsible for my life …
for my feelings …
for my personal growth …
and for every result I get…
We are not defined by what happens to us, but how we REACT to what happens; not by what life brings US, but the ATTITUDE we bring to life.
I can only control two things; my attitude and my behaviour.
It is comforting when we fully realize our responsibility (Response – Ability) is within our control. This knowledge applies to the results we want (and need) to achieve.
Results and outcomes are important, but they really are the measurement of our responses. There is a lot of power in focusing on actions that produce results. Then I can freely admit, I don’t always control outcomes; I do control my actions. I control my focus, rituals, decisions, and disciplines. When I focus on those pieces, I am learning to let results take care of themselves.
Are we 100 percent responsible for everything that happens to us?
I believe our ultimate success and happiness is 100 percent up to us, based on our responses!
“I say over and over again that if you want your children to know the truth you must give them the chance to think creatively. Stop conditioning them with beliefs; allow them to understand things for themselves. Creativity will become their capacity for life; creativity will become their wisdom. That capacity and that wisdom will lead them to the uncharted sea of truth” – Osho Shree Rajneesh
Parents stifle their children from growing up by fighting their battles for them and not allowing them to learn how to interact with people and to solve their own problems. Parents who do that are so afraid of the world hurting their child when in fact they’re hurting them more by getting too involved in their child’s situations.
You should not be doing it for them. Part of a child growing up is to fight their own battles and not having mum and dad interfering. They’re capable of managing their own lives and don’t need their parents help in doing it.
Parents need to know when to stay out of their children’s private lives and to live their own life and to let their child go. It’s hard when people have to live with parents who behave like this and it can put a strain on the relationship between parent and child, but this affects mothers more than it does fathers.
Some parents have destroyed their children’s matrimonial homes as a result of fighting their battles for them. There are also many occasions when parents intervene and tell the husband that the wife is a witch and he needs to leave her. How did they find out? They refer to some occultic “church” vision. Sometimes, he does leave or she leaves and the marriage is over, regardless of children. Some even accuse the innocent children of couples of being possessed by demons. Apart from destroying the matrimonial homes, some parents have destroyed their children’s education, careers, relationships and religious beliefs.
Most parents simply need to be realistic and consider how they may wish to stop fighting their child’s battles!
Hence, to me it’s very important that we “teach” our children to manage their emotions, to be emotionally intelligent. To me that is the base on which the child will operate through confidence.
So an important aspect of education and child development at an early stage is the training to manage their emotions and to bring the kind of stability required to be able to make more effective and successful decisions in life. How do we do that? Remember Emotional development starts with self awareness which leads to self regulation.
I always tell my children that it will get to a point in their lives and mine when I will not swallow panadol for their headaches.
What age would you leave your child alone?
At the very beginning of time, the first two siblings, Cain and Abel, did not get along with each other, and as a result Cain killed his brother! Fortunately, we can rest assured (hopefully!) that our children are not about to murder their brother or sister. However, this reassurance provides little comfort in the face of constant bickering, antagonism, jealousy, opposition and fighting.
What can parents do to eliminate sibling rivalry?